Wednesday, 28 September 2011

Grumpy Old Lady (that's me!)

I've just returned home from a trip down town, and I'm frazzled!   A lot of drivers, especially those towing caravans, tootle along 20 or 30kms slower than the speed limit, then when we get to a safe passing area, they put their foot down.  Grrrrr!!!

To soap or not to soap?

According to this information, we should not be using soap on our skin, because it strips the natural oil from it.  This is true, if you're using commercial soaps.  I used to have a bad rash on my lower legs, and needed to use moisturiser on them every day.   But I have been using my own home made soaps for 12 years now, and haven't had a rash in all that time.  Commercial soaps have the glycerine stripped out of them, but home made soaps still have it in.  Also, if you make your own soaps, you can use extra fats or oils to make them less drying. 
I agree, unless you're a mechanic, gardener, or grubby little kid, you really don't need to use soap.  But there's something luxurious about the feel of a rich, creamy personally created bar of soap, so I'll be lathering up for a long time to come.

Here are some of my fancy "cute as a button" soaps.

Politically incorrect jokes

My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.
I asked her, "Do you know him?"
"Yes", she sighed,
"He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since."
"My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"
And then the fight started... 

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat, making beer.. Always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.
When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.."
The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

The importance of walking

Walking can add minutes to your life.
This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home
at $4,000 per month.

My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old and we have no idea where the hell he is.

I like long walks,especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I have to walk early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing...
Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, she looks good doesn't she.'

We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Watermelon carving

What a shame to go to all that trouble for just a few hours.
Thank goodness for photography!

"A cage is a cage, even if the bars are gold."
Indian poet Vallathol Narayana Menon


1 comment:

  1. The button soap ist so nice.....
    How did you make it...
    regards from Germany